Chapter Seven

Newt Knew Too Much To Be Stopped By So Small A Problem

       They were going to a SSsssksss at one of the many pools of hot water that dotted the byways in and around the town. Pea was skating in diminishing radius circles around him, and then when she would touch him, she would go squealing away in utter delight.

       Wingy appeared at the door, shuddered a tiny bit and said, “MMMmmmAAAaaa AAAAMMmmIIii.” It was learning to speak the pigeon Phili that Charlie used in order to communicate with him better.

       “AAAAMMmmIIii, AAAAMMmmIIii, AAAAMMmmIIii,” Pea sang as she raced around Charlie.

       They seemed so innocent to Charlie. And he loved these two dearly. He had been living just outside their town, MmmossssP, for three weeks now, and had grown to know them, he thought, very well. He was starting to become concerned, though, because his food reserves were beginning to run low. He had no way of knowing what might or might not be edible or deadly poison.

       He had tried to get it across to Wingy that he was going to have to leave before long, but Wingy, nor any of the other Phili, seemed to understand what he was getting at. Drawing diagrams on paper or even in the dirt was next to useless. They didn’t understand the concept of representing the physical world in drawings. They knew only of physical surroundings. They knew nothing of vision or anything related to sight. They knew of light only as varying degrees of heat and how matter reacted to the heat.

       They did have a word for journey or a short time away. It was “LOOMmmnnn.” But they couldn’t comprehend just leaving for anything but a short time. It was dangerous out there! Whenever Charlie tried to tell Wingy that he needed to LOOMmmnnn, Wingy would reply in pigeonese, “CHARRRRLEEEE WiiiIIInnnsss LOOMmmnnn.” He didn’t have the heart to try to push the point that that he had to go alone.

       “CHARRRRLEEEE, CHARRRRLEEEE, CHARRRRLEEEE, “ Pea repeated, still gliding her circles and then stopped right in front of the doorway next to Wingy. Wingy and the little one led the way, shuddering greetings to this or that Phili kin. About half of the town’s inhabitants seemed to accept Charlie, and the other half acted as if they weren’t sure or avoided him altogether.

       He had nearly forgotten how bad the wind actually was as he rarely left the town limits alone. He was usually accompanied by at least two Phili besides Wingy. He was beginning to learn the different castes. He was able to discern at least four distinct orders. There were the Leaders, Soldiers, Builders, which had many levels within, and Citizens. The Citizen caste was broken down into many more layers too. The names, of course, were his own for the different social orders. He had trouble remembering the words for each. As far as he could tell, Wingy was a high ranking Citizen. He was both a learner AND a teacher. He wore his head lamp because the SSsssksss was on the outskirts away from the wind break of the buildings and the direct influence of the Phili. He wondered briefly if there were designated Phili who’s jobs were to keep the wind down. But he didn’t really think so.

       The wind was really making a go of it as they approached the SSsssksss. He could tell because the tall vegetation was practically leaning on the ground. There were about twenty of the little aliens in the water when they finally got there. Charlie was wearing his boxers, still unable to leave his modesty behind. The volcanic pool was about the size of an Olympic swimming pool, so there was plenty of room. Charlie cannon balled into the hot water, soaking Wingy and Pea before they had a chance to glide in. Pea squealed again as she and Wingy slid up to and then right over the surface of the water. Bumbles may bounce, but Phili float. Charlie laughed out loud because the two of them skating on top of the water together brought images of Mutt and Jeff to his mind.

       Suddenly, the Phili all stopped moving at the same time. Then Wingy practically screamed, “CAROOMMMmmm!” The Phili were out of the water and scattering almost immediately. He was in the water all by himself. Then Wingy was there and he was jerked roughly out of the water and into the air. Hauled along behind the racing little aliens, he had only moments to wonder what the hell was going on. One second it was dark, and the next it was like daylight. After more than a month of living in practically total darkness, Charlie’s eyes couldn’t react to the sudden appearance of a new sun. Then the shock wave hit. It was horrendous, but it wasn’t nearly as bad as he thought it should be. It’s the Phili he thought. They’re somehow dampening the concussion.

       Regardless of the Phili’s interference, they were thrown around like shoddily sewn ragmen. Charlie hit the ground with a “wuff” and tumbled end over end for a few yards further. Before he could get his bearings, there were more explosions off in the distance. And they were accompanied by fireballs. Finally, he was able to find the up direction and climbed up on his hands and knees. There was a huge fire about a mile off. That must be where the first fireball hit. He figured it must be meteorites. Semi-large ones at that. He looked around for Pea and Wingy, but couldn’t see them. Then a huge fireball stormed by overhead. He looked up at it and figured it must be several thousands of feet from the ground yet. In the light of the fireball he spotted Wingy about ten yards away. It appeared to be trying to get up and not having much luck. The wind was fierce, and he had a lot of trouble crawling to his friend. He finally made it and helped the alien up. “Pea!” he shouted above the roar of the wind and the scream of the firestorm overhead. Wingy finally regained enough strength to stand by itself. Then it turned and glided at top speed thirty yards further away from where they had fallen. Charlie didn’t even try to make the trip. He just hoped that his friend would bring the little Pea over to him so they could travel together.

       Wingy did just that. It returned with the little package that was Pea floating behind it. It was shuddering like crazy. Charlie was able to see that the little one was moving, so she wasn’t dead. Relief flooded through him. He yelled at the top of his lungs, “Get me to the Carter!” He had an idea.

       Wingy knew what the Carter was, and it seemed like it also knew what Charlie had in mind. Suddenly he was flying through the air next to Pea. Wingy was gliding at top speed and maintained that pace all the way to the town and through it to his ship on the other side. The town was in an uproar. There were Phili gliding in panic every where, and the screaming tore at Charlie’s heart. He went down, if a little roughly, on the side of his craft with the door, but Pea remained floating in the air. His friend looked as though it was going to collapse any second. He tore the door open and helped Wingy and the little one in. Pea was floated to the bed and was laid gently down. Then the alien glided up and sat in the makeshift seat that Charlie had put together for it on other earlier trips

       Charlie was in the control seat and had just started flipping switches when another meteor hit less than a half mile away. The flash of light was on them in an instant and Charlie knew that the whomp was only seconds behind. He slapped the last of the switches on and grabbed the control stick just as it hit. He gave a twist and suddenly all was quiet. He could see the devastation out the window, and he knew from experience that the inertia pulsing allowed his Phili friend’s sense of gravity out. He knew that Wingy knew that half of the town and been vaporized, and the other half was in shambles. He saw it all in the glow of blazing buildings.

       He gave a twist and a shove and they were five thousand feet up. He reached over and adjusted a dial that would increase the speed of the pulsing of the drive. He didn’t want to take any chances with what he was about to do. He gave another twist and they collided with one of the fireballs. It exploded, but they couldn’t hear of feel anything. Then he was on the next one.

       They chased fireballs for more than an hour till finally the meteor shower slowed and then stopped all together. On a hunch, he twisted the stick and headed straight up and out of the atmosphere. There were no errant meteors anywhere that he could detect on his tiny radar. But he did see something that chilled his blood down to the bone. There were hundreds of smallish space ships towing large chunks of rock toward the other side of the planet. The ships were about eighty feet long and twenty feet in diameter. They were all shaped like . . . well; pipe bombs were the words that came into his mind. And they were headed away from his position at a good clip. He figured that they had no idea that the majority of the rock bombs had been stopped in the upper atmosphere. They probably threw the damned things and then hauled butt, if they had butts, out to grab another rock. Why they were doing this, he had no idea. Then he saw another larger blip on the radar. “What now?” he said to Wingy.

       “caroommmmmm?” Wingy inquired.

       “Don’t know, but we are sure going to find out!”

       Another twist and they were under an extremely large ship with all kinds of pointy things sticking out everywhere. At one end was a huge maw, and there were at least two hundred more cylinder ships waiting inside. And he saw, as he crept closer, that they all had large rocks already in tow behind them.

       “What the hell is this all about, Wingy? Why would they bring their own rocks to the party?” And then he muttered under his breath, “Unless it’s a BYOR party.” Then he turned to Wingy and put his hand on the alien’s arm. “Well, even though we seem to be the hosts, we weren’t invited to the festivities. But this is one party we’re going to crash. And I do mean crash!”

       He headed into the cavernous area that held the cylinder ships. The S. S. Carter was like a pebble in a rock factory. Each of the cylinders was ten times his craft’s size. They stayed hidden against the vast right hand wall of the interior of the bay, slowly working their way toward the far interior. “We need a plan, Wingy,” he said. He looked back toward the little one. “How’s Pea?” he asked.

       Wingy shuddered. “LAAAANnnhhhh,” it said.

       “Me neither. I’d say let’s take her back to MmmossssP, but I’m afraid that they have too much on their plates already.” Charlie was pretty sure that his friend understood most of what he said. At least, it always reacted appropriately. “What do you think, Winged One?”

       Wingy didn’t move for a few seconds, and then it let out with one of the longest words, or concepts that he had ever heard the little guy string together. He though he heard undertones of “ONNnn” and “Mmosp” and “Pheelee,” but he wasn’t sure.

       “LAAAANnn, my friend. I don’t understand.”

       Wingy shuddered a bit and then stopped. It began to speak very slowly, trying to use pigeonese, “PHEEEEELEEEEEEE, ONNNNNNnnnnnnn, LOOMmmnnn,” and it patted its seat.

       Charlie thought for a second. “Phili, gathering, journey, here? You want me to bring the Phili soldiers here?” And then he knew that that was exactly what Wingy wanted. “You have something in mind, don’t you? I wish you could lay it out for me, but who am I to question?” With a flick of the wrist, they were out of the huge ship and on their way back to TUUchiii, the planet below.

       The Phili town was a wreck. The aliens were still putting out fires and clearing away debris. Charlie noted the ingenious way that they chained the water to the fires. They were strung out to what he presumed was the extent of their gravitational reach, and then they transported the water in an aqueduct made from pure gravity. They similarly used their abilities to clear away the stone and mortar that had been their homes. Charlie stayed out of their way, knowing that there was nothing he could do. Wingy had gone in search of OOOOMMmm and had taken Pea, who was awake by then and wanting to stay with Charlie, along with it. “CHARRRRLEEEE,” she called as she receded from view. He loved the little alien. The wind was wailing and threatened to knock him on his face, so he retreated to the safety of the craft.

       He didn’t have long to wait. Within twenty minutes, he saw Wingy coming toward him followed by a host of other Phili. They looked pretty ragged, but they also looked determined. OOOOMMmm was in front with Wingy. Charlie went outside to meet them. “I hope you realize that not all of you are going to fit in the Carter.”

       “MMMmmmAAAaaa HAAAAMm,” boomed OOOOMMmm.

       Charlie nodded to him and returned the greeting.

       “ONNNNNNnnnnnnn, LOOMmmnnn,” Wingy boomed.

       “Well, if we take a bunch of the nonessential equipment out, we can probably fit most of you.” He turned back to the craft, went in, and returned carrying the bed. “Oof,” he said as he threw it on the ground.

       Wingy vibrated intensely. “ahhhd,” it said.

       Charlie went back in and pointed to the stove. It floated gently up and out the door and was placed carefully on the ground. It only took them about ten minutes to clear the Carter out down to the bare “I gotta have that” stuff.

       Then, with the ramp in place, and Charlie in his seat, the Phili started filing in one by one. The last one squeezed in and pulled the door to. Charlie looked back and said, “It looks like a damned wing convention in here.” Then he chuckled easily. Wingy and OOOOMMmm were at the front of the crowd. He muttered, “I wonder what the term is for a gaggle of Phili.”

       “onnnnnnnnnnnnn,” Wingy whispered back.

       “You made a joke!” Charlie gasped. He shook his head and then tapped a few keys. They were instantly transported to the same space that had been located under the giant ship. The ship had moved off several miles, so with a couple of minor adjustments, they were tucked back into the underside of the dreadnought.

       “What now?” he asked.

       Wingy made a sweeping forward gesture.

       “Back where we were inside?”

       “ahhhd”

       “You’re the boss.” They slid silently into the maw again and crept along the wall. Wingy made the forward gesture again. “All the way to the back of the bus, eh? Okee Dokee, Smokey.”

       When he was in as far as he could go, he stopped and nestled in against the floor and the wall. He slowed the inertia pulsing way down to give the aliens as much access to the outside as possible. “It’s your show now, my AAAAMMmmIIii.”

       Wingy hesitated, then shuddered and reached out its hand and touched Charlie’s. “Okee Dokee.”

       It turned to OOOOMMmm as if to pass command. OOOOMMmm started humming way down deep. The other Phili joined in. “Aaaahhhhhhhhhhnnnnnnnnnn,” they hummed, zeroing in on the “nnn” part.

       The effect was immediate and startling. One of the cylinder ships broke ranks and bumped the one next to it hard. The other ship responded by banging even harder into the first, knocking it into the ship on the other side. The third ship fired a beam weapon of some sort at the first, but it was no longer there. It had rammed back into the second, and they both exploded. The beam weapon struck another ship, and very quickly it was a full blown meleé. It lasted all of sixty seconds, and suddenly they all stopped and formed up ranks as best as they could. “Uh oh,” Charlie said. “I’ll bet the boss just reamed them a new one.”

       But the Phili weren’t done. One of the huge cannons guarding the entrance to the maw spun inward and opened fire on several of the cylinders. Then another cannon. And a third. “Are you guys doing that? Or is the boss just really pissed?” But he knew the answer, for the Phili were now in a full trance state, still chanting the low “nnn.”

       The cylinder ships began firing back at the cannon, and more weapons bore down on them. The smaller ships began exploding and imploding in ones and twos. Fifty or so cranked up to full thrust and burst from the maw’s generous opening. They headed out for about a mile and then turned around, rocks still in tow. They bore down on the giant ship and released their loads simultaneously. They must have known exactly where to sling their stones, because the giant ship began exploding in small sections. The small explosions led to larger one, and those led to bigger bangs yet. The giant ship began to fall, just like the giant in the Bible. The Phili returned from wherever they had meditated to, and Charlie asked, “Time to go?”

       Wingy answered, “HOOMBA, AAAAMMmmIIii.”

       Flick. Twist. Tap. They were home. The Phili filed out and gathered around the Carter. They stretched out their senses and felt the giant ship coming apart piece by piece. Charlie could see it as fireworks from space. He thought it looked beautiful with the plate of stars that was the galaxy as the background. "Wingy, go take care of Pea. I need to do something about those meteors that are going to be thrown at the other side of TUUchiii.” Wingy wasn’t having it, though.

       “LISSs, CHARRRRLEEEE.”

       “No way, José huh?” Charlie said. “Well, I’m sure not going to put you out now.” He turned back to the craft and tiredly climbed back inside. “All aboard. And bring the ramp with you when you come.”

       Three hours later he was exhausted. “What do you want to do about the cylinder ships? You know, I could sure use shower and a nap.” He suddenly realized that he was still dressed only in his boxers. He laughed so hard that the alien appeared concerned. “No, I’m okay,” he said between breaths. “I just never imagined I’d ever be fighting hostile aliens and saving planets dressed in my shorts!” He laughed a little more and then said, “I say we leave the bad guys to die of suffocation or starvation up here, whichever comes first. What do you think? Hoomba?”

       Wingy acted like it didn’t much care for the thought of leaving them be, but it said nothing. So Charlie turned and headed for MmmossssP and some much needed sleep.